The "D" word

[galacticchick]

Looks like Yu-jin has had enough (and I can't say I blame her) and she said she wants to give MJ up. I thought the scene where MJ is still trying to hold on to her hand was very artistic.

It's been uttered in previous threads and I quite agree, he needs to show her some emotion, how would she even want to change her mind when he is acting all passive (which could be interpreted as indifference in her part)?

[tata]

It's kind of hard for him to show any outward emotion when his own mother abandoned him and favored HK over her own son, raising them. Some baggage there (steamer trunk size). When you throw granny into the mix, I'm surprised he's attracted to women at all.

[jacques]

Guest-tata said:

It's kind of hard for him to show any outward emotion when his own mother abandoned him and favored HK over her own son, raising them. Some baggage there (steamer trunk size). When you throw granny into the mix, I'm surprised he's attracted to women at all.

Isn't it interesting that both "divorce" and "dysfunction" are "D" words? ;D One begets the other, looks like. That is the precise problem with the Oh family in that dysfunction runs through it in a top-down fashion. Granny not approving of her son In-hwan marrying Soon-young, In-hwan in turn not approving of HK and HR.

Soon-young trying to be goody, goody daughter-in-law first and foremost (ignoring her own flesh and blood Min-jae). Yu-jin in turn takes her cue from SY and puts the greater Oh family (i.e. Gramps and In-hwan)'s interests before hers and MJ's. It's not good enough to say "Act like I say and not as I do" for we know kids IMITATE and EMULATE the adults like they're supposed to. Therein lies the root of dysfunction, which messes people's lives so much, it ultimately leads to break-up and divorce.

[RichardG]

"D" as DUM.

They are all crazy and should import spouses and have slaves.

[TheBo]

RichardG said:

"D" as DUM.

They are all crazy and should import spouses and have slaves.

I'm sorry, Richard, you seem to have the wrong forum here--that's Dae Jang-geum.

LOL.

Bo

[galacticchick]

RichardG said:

"D" as DUM.
They are all crazy and should import spouses and have slaves.

Your comment could be interpreted many different ways. Since I don’t want to overreact, what exactly do you mean by “buy some slaves”?

p.s. do you mean DUMB?

[RichardG]

DUM = DUMB.

BUY some slaves as get some people that are inferior, willing to BE treated as such, to BE TREATED inferior as they are all doing.

Psychologically outsiders BOUGHT see themselves inferior from where they are and will PUT UP with that happily.

The human rationality has gone nutso. It seems the old man with his company has the only upper hand not to get WACKED by everyone. His superiority?

It is into emotional crisis that normal people should not tolerate. We have one get on a plane and go. Now the wife for a seperation.

The human local society factor has been driven past endurance.

[jenny]

I think YJ is too physically and emotionally drained to make such a decision. She seems depressed (and rightly so). In a short amount of time she came to believe her husband doesn't think of her as his wife, she became pregnant, she saw how Granny still blames them for Hyun-kyu's problems, and had a miscarriage. Everything she had been working so hard for in her marriage failed so quickly, according to her. She couldn't make Min-jae love her, she couldn't convince Granny to think of them as family, and she lost her baby.

But I agree, Min-jae needs to work overtime in showing his wife that he loves her. I think him reading all those notes YJ put in their Little Jar of Happiness might have brought it home.

[Lucy]

I just have a tiny remark about something that is driving me BANANAS: "Gramps" = "Grandpa" (i.e., "Grampa"), not "Grandma." !!!!

Ahhh, that feels much better! Thank you for your indulgence.

Lucy

[jacques]

jenny said:

But I agree, Min-jae needs to work overtime in showing his wife that he loves her. I think him reading all those notes YJ put in their Little Jar of Happiness might have brought it home.

And have we ever seen Min-jae so much as hug/touch Yu-jin in the entire series? The closest thing was when he bought all those bouquets of roses when he initially learned about her pregnancy (woulda been nice if he had bothered to pluck the petals and strewn them all over their full-size bed. Even the Intercontinental Seoul knows to provide that service for the extra special occasions. My God, what kind of pseudo-Victorian world do these characters live in anyway? It wouldn't hurt to hug your wife, or give her a peck on the cheek within the privacy and confines of your own home!

[jacques]

Lucy said:

I just have a tiny remark about something that is driving me BANANAS: "Gramps" = "Grandpa" (i.e., "Grampa"), not "Grandma." !!!!

Ahhh, that feels much better! Thank you for your indulgence.

Lucy

Ah, but you see Lucy, the spirit of Gramps, i.e. the patriarchical system is alive and well in OMR, in spite of Gramps being deceased. Grannie derives her authority from Gramps, she plays the role of his surrogate in the Oh family and that is why we see EVERYONE quaking and trembling in her presence. Do you think if Gramps were alive, Kwi-boon would have the nerve to be the reactionary, geriatric loudmouth that she is? I don't think so. ;D

In-hwan could very well override her vicious judgements, but for her holding the authority of his dearly departed father. In that sense Grannie and the late patriarch, Gramps, act as one, representing this not-too-healthy system that turns the family into a reactionary and defensive unit, steamrolling anyone that gets in their way!

[Lucy]

Man, Jacques, that's some fancy footwork! It almost tempts me to "allow" you to use "Gramps" to mean "Granny" or "Grandma" . . . but, no, I just can't do it.

P.S. Excellent exegesis, however! A noble attempt.

[jacques]

Lucy said:

Man, Jacques, that's some fancy footwork! It almost tempts me to "allow" you to use "Gramps" to mean "Granny" or "Grandma" . . . but, no, I just can't do it.

P.S. Excellent exegesis, however! A noble attempt.

Did it ever occur to you that I might have intentionally referred to "Gramps" as a way of highlighting the irony that Kwi-boon, a woman herself, derives her power/sense of self from the very patriarchy that has put down other women like her, and thanks to HER actions on its behalf now, it is wreaking havoc on the lives of the next generation of women--Soon-young, Yu-jin, and Hye Ran (and of course, Soon-ok and Eun-ji by proxy)? Victims perpetrating injustices and creating other victims?

Sad (and pretty disgusting state of affairs) if you ask me. I am reminded of how in my French and Portuguese tongues (and your Italian) the "victim" is always expressed in the femminine, e.g. la vittima.

[Lucy]

the "victim" is always expressed in the femminine, e.g. la vittima.

Ah, but so are "the person": "la persona," and "the people": "la gente." Adam be da_m_n_ed: we are all Eve, and personhood is a feminine concept, as are all states of being that derive from it, victimhood included.

"Care-bear-hood," however, is both male and female, and is confined to Yu-kyung and Hye-sung.

[jenny]

Whoa, you're getting deep, guys! And I just thought it was a typo! ;D