|
|
Post by Elbs on May 9, 2004 18:38:18 GMT -5
I don't want this to come off the wrong way or anything...
I am an asian female, but I have never found myself to be attracted to asian men. Occasionally, I will come across a very good looking korean actor (like Min Jae), but I am rarely attracted to Asians. I rarely find them to be good looking. Even asian women- I rarely come across an Asian woman whom I consider to be beautiful, with, again, the exception of a few actresses(like Ja Young from YH).
I know this is probably just a matter of personal opinion, but i was wondering if I'm the only one who feels this way. Do other asians feel the same way? Do caucasians feel the same way?
|
|
|
|
Post by jacques on May 9, 2004 20:26:40 GMT -5
It depends on your background, who you grew up around, who you hung out with during the crucial times in your life (puberty, teen rebellion, college, retirement ;D, etc). Being half-Asian, I grew up all over Asia--India, Singapore, Bali, and as such find myself attracted to Asian (whether Indian or Korean) culture in general, and brown skin in particular. When I returned to the States for college, most of my friends were mostly African-American or Latino, so I dated mostly Black Americans. Every now and then I go for my European side of the racial divide, but that person better have an appreciation/be open to other cultures (like the people on this kbc Korean drama board  or there is no way we can "talk," much less communicate. Something else--I have an Asian aunt (yes, aunt) who once told me, she has only ever watched American porn (yes, porn) with Caucasian actors (70s and 80s). So, when she finally saw some diversity in the genre, she was quite put-off, and she didn't quite understand why. I told her, the Asian actors probably brought it too close to home--voyeurism is fine until you realize that could be you you're watching!  |
|
|
|
Post by xelaevoli on May 9, 2004 21:46:56 GMT -5
Well, I'm an American caucasion who was brought up in the South (NC, GA, TX, MS to name a few)...and I think most of you know what that means. (Conservative to say the least!)
The typical American male stereotype "blonde hair, blue eyes" never really attracted me. It was always those with the brown/black hair and brown eyes!
That's not to say I think all Asians are good looking...I mostly find Koreans and some Chinese (the tall "manly" ones) and a few Indians (again, the tall "manly" ones) good looking. The South Asians (Thailand, Vietnam, etc.) and Japanese, are not at all attractive to me.
Maybe it's because of our experiences with the males in our race. The guys in my school were idiots in my opinion and not worth my time or affection. Except for one guy in Academy (HS)... he piqued my interest, but I never told him... he was from a traditional Asian family who would never allow "mixing" (later learned he was Korean). My first boyfriend was Hispanic! (Believe it or not, it was in college! LOL)
In spite of my Southern heritage, I've always been known as being open-minded... I remember wearing a shirt that said "Cross colors...be colorblind" around.
;D Oops, I think I got off track... Sorry! :-)
BTW, I'm married to a Korean man I met in China while teaching English (he was studying Chinese). We were married in Seoul, Korea, lived with his parents for a year (had my son in Korea) and are now in America.
Melissa
|
|
|
|
Post by TheBo on May 10, 2004 10:09:43 GMT -5
Elbs, it is a mystery, isn't it. Some people prefer people like those they grew up with, and some prefer people entirely different. Maybe it has to do with how adventurous one is, or maybe it has to do, as Jacques says, with those 'crucial times' in your life. I'm about the whitest-color woman I know (I even wrote a poem mentioning this LOL) and I grew up in Wisconsin, mostly in a small, insular town. I have had various levels of "relationships" with Asian, Hispanic, African-American, Greek, Italian, Lebanese...many different kinds of men. (No snide remarks, please.) All my friends thought I "preferred" foreign or black men. But Bob-my-Bob is white bread boy, although he certainly shares my political and social views. The only reason I started dating HIM was because HE went after ME--I was not interested; he convinced me. He was right--we've been going strong for several years now; he's the best thing that ever happened to me, to use a trite-but-true phrase. My conservative, small-town sister married a Lebanese. My brother married a Cuban. They've both got kids and are living the suburban life. My youngest, wildest sister has dated Jewish, black, white and Hispanic guys. What it finally boils down to, I think, is not so much to whom you are "attracted," but with whom you fall in love. I don't think it much matters until then the sort of person you are with, so why not enjoy people for whatever reason?
Bo
|
|
|
|
Post by Lucy on May 10, 2004 11:25:42 GMT -5
Interesting discussion. I'm sort of Irish- and maybe Slavic-looking, though pretty much the rest of my family is Italian-looking. The men I have dated have been different types (e.g., short and Asian, short and Italian, very tall and English, tall and Jewish, etc.), but ideally (i.e., in fantasy rather than reality) I tend to go for dark hair and dark eyes. I don't know why. It just looks good to me! I find brown eyes deep and friendly. One thing that I will remark on, though, is that Americans (and, often, Europeans) tend to be sort of "mongrels"--which is not a slam, just my way of saying that they tend to have various genetic influences all mixed together, and their features are not very "decided" or, IMO, all that interesting. A lot of people are kind of amorphous in the facial area. I like strong features and a definite look. So that would explain why I think men from a different and relatively coherent ethnic background are interesting. Having said that, I also like anyone, including those with an apparent ethnic heritage similar to mine, who has a distinctive face. The whole thing about having crushes or just being attracted to someone on TV is that it's all about looks, and you're free to judge them on that basis alone. It's fun, because it's nothing like real life, where other factors (like, oh, those small matters of character and personality!) are involved and, as Bo did, you may well find yourself loving someone who looks nothing like what you thought your "type" was. I guess this is off the subject of the original question. I don't really have an answer for Elbs, but I suppose it proves that generalizations about attraction don't really hold. Why does one Asian female find Asian males in general not that interesting? Why does a Hispanic woman love Asian men? I do not know, but to each his own, etc. Oh, and hands off Min-jae. (Kidding!!  ) |
|
|
|
Post by galacticchick on May 10, 2004 11:40:33 GMT -5
I’m not Asian, but I have always found Asian men super attractive. It’s just something about those eyes. But really, I just have an appreciation for any good-looking man (“when it comes to super-fine, I’m color blind” is my motto). I tend to like the taller Asian’s though and I’m with Miss Swan (MadTV) who says “I want a man who look-a like a man” so I guess that’s why I prefer MJ over HK, something just turns me off about his highlighted hair. There are some pretty good-looking Japanese actors and singers too, but in some of the magazines I’ve seen (like Bidan, Men’s No No) it’s hard to tell whether the person is a man or a woman!
|
|
|
|
Post by Elbs on May 10, 2004 15:19:20 GMT -5
thanks everyone for all the great insights. I guess it really is just a matter of personal tastes. (heehee thanks again Bo.. ) |
|
|
|
Post by redstone911 on May 12, 2004 10:44:50 GMT -5
Interesting topic of discussion...I recall reading papers that often quote studies claiming that in the U.S., among people of Asian-descent, at least 45 percent marry outside their racial group, and I guess that's not counting intercultural marriages..i.e. Chinese marrying Filipino, Cambodian marrying Japanese.....It might be accurate to say that a majority of women of Asian-descent marry non-Asian males...while Asian males tend to marry within their racial group, for a variety of reasons, some of which have been cited by some frustrated Asian males...and even females: that they are deemed less physically attractive compared to males of other races, that they are often stereotyped as being "dorks" or "geeks"...but in my personal view, I think Asian males in danger of succumbing to that way of thinking should focus more on improving other aspects of their life...instead of obsessing over their "image" problem....
Coming from an Asian country (Philippines) where I think people are generally open-minded about these things, mainly for economic reasons, (annually, thousands of Philippine women marry foreigners and leave the country....), a number of women (based on observation, and the local media ....) who share the view that Philippine men often do not make good husbands because they do not possess the right personality and character traits....these guys frequently engage in drinking, womanizing, spending too much time with their buddies,have domineering personalities, etc....But these women don't seem to foster any illusions that foreign men are any better...but at least, an American, Australian, or European generally will still be able to provide a much better standard of living, if anything else, and their kids may generally come out looking more attractive, in their view......
I must admit though, even living in New York City, where it seems interracial couples are everywhere...I find it much more pleasing to the eye whenever I see an Asian man and woman walking hand-in-hand....
I guess that is also one reason why I enjoy K-dramas and J-dramas, as well as movies from east Asia...just seeing Asian couples...especially if they look absolutely great together like Karasawa Toshiaki and Suzuki Honami, or my favorite K-drama couple, Choi Su-jong and Lee Seung-Yun!
|
|
|
|
Post by WinterBallad on May 12, 2004 12:15:36 GMT -5
In Hawaii, we're known as the melting pot of the Pacific for the simple fact that we have a multitude of cultures. So I have had the pleasure of meeting, greeting, and seeing all kinds of men. Japanese, Filipino, Samoans, Whites, Italians, and so on and so on. But as for me I have always been attracted to Asians. Not to say that others are bad looking, I believe they are good and bad in all nationalities; but Asians have always attracted me. I guess it's the nerdy look. Ha! Ha! Ha! ;D ;D ;D But I think the best way to decide on how to chose a person, is by how that person makes you feel inside. What is inside of a person is what matters alot and that someone's look is just icing on the cake. Just my opinion! I love this discussion. We speak to each other with different thoughts. And Lucy could we please share Min-Jae. He is just too good-looking for just one person. Hee! Hee! Hee!, just kidding. I think he's a great actor. |
|
|
|
Post by Lucy on May 12, 2004 12:26:37 GMT -5
Why certainly, WinterBallad. I agree. I don't mean to be grabby. Plus, think how cute we'd all look in a group, buzzing happily around our quiet, smiling Min-jae.  |
|
|
|
Post by WinterBallad on May 12, 2004 12:56:24 GMT -5
Thank you Lucy. Now I can enjoy my day smiling all the way.
Winter
|
|
|
|
Post by HappyCamper on May 13, 2004 5:38:51 GMT -5
Hey don't forget about me you guys! I also love MJ!
|
|
|
|
Post by Lucy on May 13, 2004 11:12:30 GMT -5
No worries, HC. See above ref to our gaggle of girls surrounding MJ. However, I call I get to sit on his lap and pet his spiky li'l head. Hey! No shoving! |
|
|
|
Post by galacticchick on May 13, 2004 12:42:45 GMT -5
We'll just have to convince him to move to Utah with all of us and he'll be the "pimpin-ist" Mormom in Salt Lake City. Is this is the first drama y'all seen him in? If so I've got dibs cause I loved him first in So This Is Love! ;D
*Ouch, Lucy, stop pulling my hair!*
|
|
or there is no way we can "talk," much less communicate.
)
