New look, new attitude

[galacticchick]

Seems little Ji-min (and a new haircut) have given Ja-young extra strength to overcome the situation.

Although from a realistic point of view she was totally correct, I found Ja-young to be a little too harsh when she told Young-joon "Don't you see you are so burdensome to me?". I mean excuse him for loving you so much. I was glad that Young-joon reciprocated by letting her know that she was being a little too insulting. If only he had shown this much backbone to Hyun-ji... Okay, I admit this board was a little more lively when Hyun-ji was here, but let's hope this is just the calm before the storm.

[JadeEyes]

I don't think there's anything "a little too" about it...her treatment of Young-joon I find extremely harsh, and needlessly so, IMO. If he's willing to stay friends but respect her decision to never again pursue anything beyond that, I don't see why she won't allow that. He's the "wronged party" here and if he's willing to get past that so that he can show concern and helpfulness from a respectful distance, I think she ought to be ok w/ that and show gratitude while remaining careful not to be overly encouraging about rekindling the former relationship.

This man has been nothing but extraordinarily sweet and kind to her. Had he not been where he was by a mere fluke, she and the Chuncheon grandma could've stumbled down the country road looking for a cab when she was in labor. He continues to reach out in basically non-obtrusive ways to offer his help and support. Yet, all Ja-young seems able to do in response is to be harsh, cold and kind of abusive, like calling him "burdensome" --- that's plain mean.

When she found out about the crib, I think she could've written a brief note thanking him, but expressing concern that it was overly generous and she would be more comfortable if he will in the future refrain from overdoing it, in terms of paying bills or purchasing expensive gifts. I think there would be a way to word such a message that was not nasty and hurtful. Also, I have to believe people have checking accounts in Korea. They have credit cards, so I would think they'd have other banking services similar to the US. She could've included a check for the amount YJ paid on the hospital bill w/ a sentence in her note saying something like, "I appreciate the very kind and gracious gesture of you wanting to reduce our expenses by covering the cost of our hospital care. I did save for this expense, however, and have enough to cover these costs myself. Therefore, I include a check for that amount and hope you will accept it. It's so sweet of you to want to help. In the future, though, you can be sure I will let you know if I could use your help with anything. Unless I ask you, I would appreciate it if you wouldn't take on responsibilities of this kind. I'm grateful for your kind intentions."

Of course, this wouldn't play anywhere as dramatically as the confrontation we saw in the cafe. Also, on principle, I think it would be smarter for Ja-young to limit any contact she has w/ Young-joon to written. If she doesn't want to send the message that he can see her by sending gifts, etc, that's not the way to go about it.

I understand and respect her determination to be a self-sufficient single mother and not be beholden to anyone or reliant on another person. But she's carrying it too far. I remember what it was like to be a new mother, just starting out. There are so many things you need and the costs can really add up. I was thrilled to get all the help I could, and gratefully accepted gifts of used baby furniture and clothes. I would've been ecstatic had someone sent me a brand new beautiful crib...and I'd be delighted to have help with medical bills, which I still have out the wazoo. I would even accept help from an ex...as long as it was clear he understood it wasn't buying him anything in return.

But none of my exes have ever given me anything but headaches!

And I like your point, Galactic, about how funny it is the two of them have finally found their backbones. Ja-young could have used a big helping of the assertiveness she shows now w/ Young-joon when Min-joo was constantly demanding to see her and she didn't want to. And Young-joon could've benefitted from being so direct when he was dealing w/ Hyun-ji for like 6 mos. instead of letting her call all the shots.

Jade

[galacticchick]

I couldn't agree more JadeEyes. I remember Ja-young telling Young-joon that she didn't want to hurt anyone and be hurt by anyone; however, I find that in her effort not to hurt anyone she is in reality hurting all the people who care about her.

Wow! You even had the letter all planned out! We'll name you honorary YH writer. LOL ;D

[yobo]

Yes, JY has turned into perhaps the hardest to read or figure out in recent days. In a thread or two when the 2 were still a couple and the big "dump" was in the planning stages, I speculated that JY never really loved YJ, as it seemed she could never contemplate all this if she did. Then when she later told him, answering his question, that yes she did love him (wishing she could say no), I thought OK I'm wrong again. OTOH, we probably all know how impossible it is to fall out of love at will. So maybe she wants him to stay away because she doesn't trust herself to be able to keep resisting him? She doesn't get any scenes that reveal her inner thoughts like YJ does, so either she doesn't have any, or the writers want to keep her a mystery to us. LIke I said before, it seems something bad will have to happen to poor YJ so she'll realize her real feelings and be filled with remorse. BTW, Jade Eyes, regarding the unpredictable starting times of YH esp. in the morning, things could be and have been worse. I recall within the last couple of years that daily dramas that were supposed to start about 5:50 sometimes started after 6, and once started at 5:10! Also there were a few times when Ch.28 went off the air for a day or two at a time, and I thought Oh no, they must have gone belly-up, because I'm the only guy in the world that watches!

[jenny]

Too funny, Yobo! For years I thought I was the only one watching! If anyone cares, I think JY's new do makes her look so much older and more sophisticated, but the bitterness towards YJ is uncalled for.

[JadeEyes]

I'm of two minds about the haircut.

On 1 hand, it's a very attractive cut...it's stylish and yes, has a very sophisticated look. And it does make her look older --- not an effect most women over 25 seek out deliberately.

OTOH, I really loved her long hair...it was so beautiful and it looked so pretty on her. Not all women can wear hair that long and achieve so flattering an effect. And the scrunchies were sort of her trademark, weren't they? Well, say goodbye to the scrunchies!

From a practical standpoint, I recommend shorter hair for a new mom. Long hair gets in the way a lot when bending over to lift the baby out of the crib and putting the baby up on mom's shoulder for burping, etc. My friend had long hair when she had her first baby and she said it got so tangled and matted constantly and full of baby puke a lot of the time. She said she was either putting it up and pinning it or tying it back every day, and it was always coming down and getting in her face. This was at a time when she was up at all sorts of odd hours, nursing the baby and walking with her. She said it was just such a drag to be dealing with her hair on top of caring for an infant.

The baby will pull the hair too! Ouch!

I'm curious as to what's behind the hair-cutting development. It's a big deal to ask an actor or actress to alter his or her appearance so radically. I remember there was a show I watched and a female character w/ really long hair was drugged by a psycho rival who chopped the drugged woman's hair off while she was out cold. It was really shocking.

Later, I saw an article somewhere that talked about the hair cutting thing. It said the actress decided she was sick of her long hair and wanted to go short. She talked to the producers about her decision and they came up w/ the drugging storyline and wrote her haircut right into the dramatic action.

This makes me wonder if something similar happened here. Maybe Lee Tae Rahn (who plays Ja-young) wanted to go w/ a different do, and she talked it over with the YH people, who gave her the go-ahead and came up w/ a way to work it into the plot. From the perspective of the storyline, though, I didn't really understand its significance. What did the hair-cutting symbolize to Ja-young? Is it that she's making herself over into a whole new person, w/ a different direction and purpose in life? I wasn't sure but figured that could be a possibility. Anyone else have other guesses?

Last item, just very quick: I'm afraid now I should modify my statement of yesterday that Young-joon's involvement since the break up has been relatively non-obtrusive. In last night's ep., he clearly crossed the line from anonymous gifter from the sidelines to full-blown stalker. Sitting in his car outside JY's home at night, watching for her, and showing up outside her office building at the end of the workday...that's way over the line. She's told him to stay away and he agreed to it...very reluctantly. But he's not keeping his end of the agreement. No matter how much it hurts, if an ex bf or gf says it's over, please stay away, that's what the person should do.

I love YJ and think he's the greatest guy...but he really needs to give this "shadowing" thing up. It's very unhealthy and crossing over to creepy. In my youth, I had a couple of boyfriends I broke it off w/ do this kind of thing...hang out outside where I was and wait for me or watch my house or try to approach me or find excuses to see or talk to me. It was really creepy and bothersome. I hate seeing YJ reduce himself to this kind of prideless, pathetic creature.

One other thing...I could not believe it when Grandma Sohn told YJ all she wanted from him was to see him get married and live happily. Yeah, right! Could've fooled me! He had a chance to get married to someone he adored and would have been deliriously happy w/ and what did Grandma do? Everything in her power to smash the relationship to pulverized dust...and succeeded. I feel so sorry for this guy. He's getting it from all sides. At least The Barracuda is out of his life!

Jade

[galacticchick]

You stole the words out of my mouth JadeEyes. I was speechless at Grandma Sohn's "little request".

She is in my list for top 3 hated characters, right after Minjoo and Hyun-ji. Grrr...if I was Young-joon . The actor who plays YJ is really good, I observed his facial expressions and they totally reflected his desperation and disbelief of what his grandma was saying.

As far as the haircut, I've messed around w/long vs. short hair, and I think the cut she has now is just as inconvinient as the one she had before. When you cut it too short or in too many layers, it's almost impossible just as frustrating to try and get it into a pony tail. And bangs? Forget about it!

[yobo]

As for actors and their on-screen hairstyles, I have been surprised a few times to find out that the character was wearing a wig the whole time, or even when a supposed haircut turned out to be just a short wig, or some kind of plaster mold.
(Remember Elvis in Jailhouse Rock?) So it's possible Ja-young got tired of wearing a long wig all the time for her character, tho not likely.

[JadeEyes]

I too think Grandma Sohn is a true villian. The worst part is, it's not enough she's gotten her way and kept her grandson and Ja-young apart, permanently trashing what they had. She has to keep twisting the knife in and bringing it up over and over. I can't for the life of me figure out why Young-joon ever moved back in with her. Yes, I know it was Ja-young's last request to him, but so what? What does he owe her? When was the last time she did anything he asked of her?

See if you can get that studio back, Young-joon. Your grandma is a miserable harpy. Spa certificate my heinie! The only way I'd treat this woman to a spa is if I could shove her in the sauna, jam the door shut and turn up the steam full blast. Steamed crab, yum-mee!

I agree with you too about the acting. I think one of the great strengths of this show is the talented cast across the board, and how well cast each actor is. But the guy who plays Young-joon I agree is phenomenal! His pain and tears always make me cry. He's amazing. But they're all superb.

Jade Eyes

[yobo]

Remember when early on Ja-young's mom was in the hospital and met Grandma Sohn, and they became fast friends? She was the sweetest old lady then, but didn't seem to have much of a purpose in the story, especially with the soon passing of her friend. So it's all YJ's fault that she turned into a villain, that brat!

[galacticchick]

yobo said:

So it's all YJ's fault that she turned into a villain, that brat!

More like the fault of her stubborn & ancient mindset!

I can see which addicts can't wait till 6:00 p.m. till the next episode!

[petirrojo]

Color me happy to have found this forum! I'm not Korean, and here in Oak Park (Chicago area) it's not like I've got lots of Korean people to help with answering the cultural questions that crop up regularly!

Okay, down to business...

Ja-young decides she's been "reborn" with the birth of her son; she's not going to hide behind lies, pretending he's somebody else's, etc., so to commemorate the occasion she goes and impulsively cuts her hair into a modern "do". (I say impulsively, though we see not a hint of impulsivity flash across her face, so I'm guessing that's her motivation for the crop.)

For someone who is ready to wear the shame of being an unwed mother so boldly (at least at work), she's still stuck in the mode where she cares waaaaay too much about what the old biddy who's the barrier to the happiness of many people thinks. Would it really be the end of the world as we know it if granny cuts ties with her grandson? Maybe the ancestors would roll in their graves, but I think they'd stop spinning in a year or two, after Ja-young proves that she can be a good wife and mother to their honorable descendent.

This seems like specious logic to me. You're either a modern girl or you're not.

[JadeEyes]

You make some excellent points, petirrojo!

I think you are probably quite right about what's behind JY's sudden haircut. I think it probably is part of the "reborn" idea.

I also don't understand her rigid stubborness about not marrying the man she loves against his grandmother's wishes. I'm sure she would get over it eventually, and it's really up to YJ if he cares more about being estranged from his grandma than happiness with a life partner. I can't imagine many men who would sacrifice the latter for the former. If he can live with his grandmother's cold shoulder, JY should be able to handle it too.

I guess it's just a device to keep them apart and keep the drama turned up to high, but it does make JY look very contradictory and rather unreasonable.

Jade